When I was newly married and helping put my husband through his final year of college, I worked at a drug store behind the camera counter which doubled as the return desk. It was a deep immersion into the world of complaints. One of the most memorable was a post-Christmas encounter with a man dissatisfied … Continue reading Do Everything without Complaining or Arguing
Father Cajetan Cuddy, O.P., writing in the Magnificat Lenten Reader, recalls an etiquette class he was enrolled in as a child. "One of the most memorable things I learned in the class," he writes, "was always to pay attention to the other person in a conversation. True communication is impossible if one or both conversation … Continue reading Wrenching Ourselves from Distraction to Attend to those Closest to Us
Very early in John's gospel (2:23-25), just after the wedding at Cana and the first cleansing of the temple, the text notes that "many believed in [Christ] when they saw the signs that he was doing." Those must have been exhilarating days for the disciples who first left everything they had to follow him. Numbers … Continue reading Human Praise: The Tempered View of Christ
Little by little, I've been reading Dignity: Its Essential Role in Resolving Conflict as part of a book study with some fellow early childhood educators who want to provide the very best for the children and families they serve. The author, Dr. Donna Hicks, has spent almost two decades facilitating dialog in communities in conflict … Continue reading How to Create True Intimacy (and Avoid Gossip’s Tempting Secrecy)
"But I tell you, on the day of judgment people will render account for every careless word they speak. By your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned." (Matthew 12:36) Careless: "not giving sufficient attention or thought to avoiding harm or errors." It's not a comfortable thing for a … Continue reading Why We’re Accountable for Every Careless Word
Overcoming our negative speech habits is so challenging that it's tempting to stop working on it. We fail, and that's discouraging. We're only human, after all. Why keep trying? When our good intentions evaporate and the truth conveyed by saints and scripture no longer inspires, we can always check out what researchers say about speech. … Continue reading Three Reasons to Increase Your Positive Speech
A principal at one of the schools in my district called me one afternoon because their counselor was away at a conference and one of his students needed someone to talk to. Our counselors work together and support each other, and I was happy to help. I drove across town to the other school and … Continue reading Thank You: Words of Humility and Peace
"Speak boastfully no longer, do not let arrogance issue from your mouths." This verse is from Hannah's song of praise after learning that her prayer for a child had been answered. Her canticle (1 Samuel 2:1-10) is rich with thoughts we find in Mary's Magnificat (Luke 1:46-55). Both women display a humble soul, for … Continue reading Do Not Heap Boasting Upon Boasting
In the gospel of Matthew (15:18-19) Christ tells us exactly where all our tongue-trouble is rooted: "But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile. For from the heart come: evil thoughts murder adultery unchastity theft false witness blasphemy These are what defile a person..." Our trouble with … Continue reading Trouble with Words is Heart Trouble
Even worse than humanity's general tendency to use our tongues as swords is the fact that so many Christians do it to each other. It has always been so, because we are being perfected but few if any among us are perfected yet. But we must not accept this state of affairs. St. Paul, writing … Continue reading Christian vs. Christian: Stop Tearing Each Other Apart
