Father Cajetan Cuddy, O.P., writing in the Magnificat Lenten Reader, recalls an etiquette class he was enrolled in as a child. "One of the most memorable things I learned in the class," he writes, "was always to pay attention to the other person in a conversation. True communication is impossible if one or both conversation … Continue reading Wrenching Ourselves from Distraction to Attend to those Closest to Us
Little by little, I've been reading Dignity: Its Essential Role in Resolving Conflict as part of a book study with some fellow early childhood educators who want to provide the very best for the children and families they serve. The author, Dr. Donna Hicks, has spent almost two decades facilitating dialog in communities in conflict … Continue reading How to Create True Intimacy (and Avoid Gossip’s Tempting Secrecy)
"But I tell you, on the day of judgment people will render account for every careless word they speak. By your words you will be acquitted, and by your words you will be condemned." (Matthew 12:36) Careless: "not giving sufficient attention or thought to avoiding harm or errors." It's not a comfortable thing for a … Continue reading Why We’re Accountable for Every Careless Word
"Speak boastfully no longer, do not let arrogance issue from your mouths." This verse is from Hannah's song of praise after learning that her prayer for a child had been answered. Her canticle (1 Samuel 2:1-10) is rich with thoughts we find in Mary's Magnificat (Luke 1:46-55). Both women display a humble soul, for … Continue reading Do Not Heap Boasting Upon Boasting
Boast: to speak with exaggeration and excessive pride. In our all-about-me culture, it's becoming increasingly prevalent (and seemingly acceptable) to interrupt and one-up conversations with stories about ourselves. Kirstin Wiigs' SNL character "Penelope" helps me see this side of myself. I don't like it, but I'm grateful for the humorous take. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGQBFMdJZow … Continue reading Penelope Unmasks Our All-About-Me Monologs
In the gospel of Matthew (15:18-19) Christ tells us exactly where all our tongue-trouble is rooted: "But the things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and they defile. For from the heart come: evil thoughts murder adultery unchastity theft false witness blasphemy These are what defile a person..." Our trouble with … Continue reading Trouble with Words is Heart Trouble
Wendell Berry--poet, novelist, lover of the land--distills life to its essence, teaching us to value the concrete beauty in the natural world and to question our innumerable ways of wasting days that could be filled with wonder. Wrestling with my own abundant speech and strong need for quiet contemplation, I am drawn to Berry's values … Continue reading The Silence: A Poem By Wendell Berry
Set a guard before my mouth, Lord. Keep watch over the door of my lips. Psalm 141:3 This post is part of a series (see A Lenten Invitation from a Babbling Brook: Focus on Speech and Silence). To receive new installments, you’re invited to Follow Sparrowfare by placing your email address in the box in … Continue reading A Prayer for a Guarded Tongue
They say she went to the well at noon to avoid the gossipy glances of the community's women who gathered there to chat when it was cooler. They saw her as we all would: a woman who'd "been around the block," living with a guy after having blown through five marriages. They saw a failure. … Continue reading The Moral Blindness Behind Our Gossip
Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, that you may know how to respond. (Colossians 4:6) When out with friends and the topic is critical of another, let my speech be gracious and kind, protective of the other's dignity. When the tone turns anti-Christian, let my speech be gracious, seasoned with the salt … Continue reading A Simple Rule for Speech
